So I found
this video on youtube and boy did it bring back some memories. Basically the video is girl confessing how she's a Christian and she *gaspity* likes yaoi. I know, in my case, it was something I really struggled with when I was a teenager. I’ve been reading yaoi fanfics and doujinshi since I was about thirteen. As I stated in a
previous entry the only people I was open about it with were my two sisters. And just like the girl in the video who had to get doom and gloom from her friends I received the same talk from them. Constantly. Fire and brimstone and gnashing of teeth and all that fun stuff.
Did their scare tactics work? You better believe it. I would go for months without reading yaoi and BL but then relapse like an alcoholic. At certain points I had my sister trash my BL collection. Seriously. My Japanese Gravitation manga, my knockoff gravitation dvds, Menkui!, Bokura no Okuku, and I could go on and on, they all went in the dumpster. Gone. I had my sister toss ‘em because I couldn’t do it. I was quite obviously, a weak Christian. But why would I have her do something so wasteful? Why not sell the manga (which I wanted to do)? I can’t remember specifically, but I know there is a certain passage in the bible that had a group of people burning unholy books. It was better to burn the books then to spend an eternity in hell, I guess. And also, it was better to just dump ‘em because if I sold them I would be spreading temptation to others and that was just as wrong as reading the yaoi myself.
So, how did I rationalize my attraction to this material? I would tell my sisters I read it for the story, not the sex. Oh, wow. Really. How could anybody believe that? Especially when I read things like Under Grand Hotel. The thing is, they didn’t know I was reading such graphic material, so I could trick ’em. But how did I rationalize it to myself? At first I told myself I would eventually grow out of it. But as I neared my 20’s it was quite obvious it wasn’t going anywhere. So, next I turned to the bible and nowhere in it will you find Peter, Paul, Matthew, John, Mary, Job, or your mom ever say anything about how wrong it was for two male cartoon characters to engage in hot sex. So I had an out! I was free to read and watch as much as I wanted and have no fear of burning eternally! Right? Right? Wrong. The problem is I knew I was BSing and my sisters knew I was BSing and that just made it worse.
What turned everything around for me is when I said screw it and just opened up about it. I told my mom, my brothers, my friends, anybody and everybody who would let me ramble about it. I don’t want to sound cliché or corny but really and truly, accepting that part of me helped me let go of a lot of agony I put myself through. During my last years as a Christian, yaoi wasn’t a issue anymore. I accepted it and the people who filled my life accepted it. And boy what a relief it was to be as open about liking it as I was about liking something such as Final Fantasy VI (the best final fantasy EVER).
So, yes, it is possible to like yaoi and be a Christian and not have to feel guilty about it. I know in some family’s you can’t tell your mom, dad or your friends without severe repercussions, but as long as you’re okay with it, it’s not really necessary to tell anyone else. Life is too short, so if reading yaoi makes you happy, keep on keepin’ on.
Me too! This news is a mixture of good and bad, though. Starting March 1st 460 Best Buy stores will start selling their anime at 50% off. Awesome, right?! Now here's the bad part, after March 26th, 500 of these stores will only have 20 anime SKUS (wow >_<), but the top 200 Best Buy stores will carry 100 anime SKUS. So, yeah, that sucks. Whenever I wanted to purchase a new release I always went to Best Buy and the one I live near has a very broad selection. Hopefully the store I go to will be one that will have 100 SKU's. But call up your local Best Buy and see if they're taking part in the sale.
